Instead of live-blogging with loathing like every other film blog I celebrated the Oscars eventually with corndogs, beer, cake and hissing at Al Gore (is he Botoxed or just internalizing all my hate?) But first I spent a good 30 minutes of Oscar's time navigating an unfamilar area of Berkeley trying to find the hottest Oscar spot. Anywoo:
- Prettiest dressed: Jennifer Lopez, Penelope Cruz (
Alexander McQueen FTW!!!uhm or Atelier Versace totally biting his style, hmm) and Francis Ford Coppola with his very rebellious blue bowtie decision (men's formal fashion = so boring). - Scariest image: drunk-fool bald-headed Jack Nicholson, that is a whole lot of ugly to have in a sea of America's finest celebrities. It almost seems cruel, but then I remember that he is wearing sunglasses indoors thus = douche.
- Biggest Yeah-You-Better: Marie Antoinette for costumes. Only nominated for one award when it was the most exciting concept/best executed film of 2006? Are we not supposed to like movies or something?
- Awesomeness: Ennio Morricone and Ruby Yang for accepting their awards in Italian and Chinese respectively. Our lazy American ears almost shrivel at the notion of hearing other languages. but you say, Funk That!
- Freaky Shadow Dancing: Those penguins! That shoe! The gun! Eek! This was my favorite "updating the traditional" gimmick of the evening.
- Best WTF Moment: Nicholson and Keaton fighting/in-joking while presenting Best Picture. Why were they mad during the intros and then almost making out when it came to announcing the winner? Uhm, the short answer will do just fine.
- Hostess with the Mostest: Kudos to Ellen Degeneres for being able to articulate what we're all thinking but making it seem much less mean. And your girlfriend is so hott she scalds the tv screen.
- Best Website: Oscar's official Evolution of Fashion coverage. Drool!
- Are You on Crack?: People thought Jerry Seinfeld's bit was funny? You can't possibly be so attached to 1992 that you're still laughing at the same jokes. Get off the rock!
EDIT: Behold! The victory burrito for awesome Oscar predictions! Thank you, Shawn! Your devotion to Eddie Murphy was touching but ultimately foolish. 
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